A women takes a lover.

One day the lover is over at the womens house and they are upstairs making love. A little while later little Johnny comes home unexpectedly and finds the mother and lover in bed. So little Johnny goes into the bedroom closet to watch.

A short time later, the husband comes home unexpectedly and the wife tells the lover to get in the closet.

After a few moments little Johnny speaks out and says to the lover, “Dark in here isn’t it?”, to which the stunned lover replies, “Yes it is”.

Little Johnny says, ‘You know I have a baseball.” The lover says, “Thats nice.” Little Johnny says “Would you like to buy it”, the lover says “Not really”. Little Johnny says “You know my daddy is outside”. The lover says “Ok how much?”. Little Johnny says 20 dollars and the lover says “20 Dollars!”, and then remembers his situation and pays him.

Couple of weeks later, the women has the lover over again and they are upstairs making love when little Johnny comes home unexpectedly. He sees them in bed and goes into the closet to watch.

A short time later the husband comes home unexpectely and the women tells the lover to get in the closet. After a few seconds little Johhny says, “Dark in here isn’t it?”, to which the stunned lover replies, “Yes it is”.

Little Johhny says, you know I have a baseball glove, and the lover remembering the previous discussion with little Johnny, says “How Much? Little Johnny says 50 dollars. The lover pays the money.

A couple of days later the husband comes home early from work and says, “Johnny get your ball and glove and we will play catch.” Little Johnny says “I cant’ daddy, I sold them.” The husband says “You did? How much did you get for them?” Little Johnny replies, seventy dollars. The husband says, “Johnny, thats not right, you cannot take advantage of your friends like that, and you must go to confession.”

The husband marches little Johnny down to the church and sets little Johnny inside the confessional and steps away.

Soon thereafter the priest enters the other side and waits for Little Johnny’s confession. After a short silence, little Johnny says, “Dark in here isn’t it?”, and the priest says, “Don’t start that crap in here!”

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A doctor and a lawyer in two cars collided on a country road.

The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from his hip flask.

The doctor accepted and handed the flask back to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away.

“Arent you going to have a drink yourself?” asked the doctor.

“Sure, after the police leave,” replied the attorney.

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The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so a blonde went in to try out for the job.

“Okay, honey,” the sheriff drawled, “What is 1 and 1?”

“Eleven,” she replied.

The sheriff thought to himself, “That’s not what I meant, but she’s right.” Then the sheriff asked, “What two days of the week start with the letter ‘T’?”.

“Today and Tomorrow,” she replied.

He was again surprised that the blonde supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself. “Now, listen carefully, who killed Abraham Lincoln?”, asked the sheriff.

The blonde looked a little surprised herself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, “I don’t know.”

The sheriff replied, “Well, why don’t you go on and work on that one for a while?”

So, the blonde wandered over to the beauty parlor, where her buds were waiting to hear the results of the interview.

The blonde was overjoyed. “It went great! First day on the job and I’m already working on a murder case!”

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A bear is chasing a rabbit through a forest. They find a bottle and decide to rub it. A genie pops out. He says, “I will grant each of you three wishes.”

The bear says, “I wish all the bears in the forest were females.” *poof* It’s done.

The rabbit says, “I wish for a motorcycle.” *poof* It’s done.

The bear says, “I wish all the bears in this country were females.” *poof* It’s done.

The rabbit says, “I wish for a lifetime supply of carrots back at my house.” *poof* It’s done.

The bear is thinking to himself. “Why is the rabbit wasting his wishes on stupid small things? oh well.” “And for my third wish, I wish that all the bears in the world were female.” *poof* It’s done.

The rabbit says, “For MY last wish, I want the bear to be gay.” And he rides off on his motorcycle.

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