A front end clerk in a pharmacy has just been admonished by the owner for missing too many sales. “I’m sorry” the boss says “But one more missed sale and your fired”

The next customer that comes in has a terrible cough and asks the problem clerk for help. Unable to recall where the cough remedies are, the nervous clerk points to a box of Ex-Lax and says “Here, buy this then go over to our cooler and take all of it with plenty of water”.

The customer thanks him and obliges. Finishing his last glass of water, the customer exits the pharmacy. Once outside he stops, takes a few faltering steps, then hugs a telephone pole. The boss, having witnessed the entire scene, approaches the clerk and asks him what he recommended.

“Ex-Lax,” says the clerk hesitantly.
“Ex-Lax !” yells the boss. “That won’t help a cough!”
“Sure it does,” says the clerk. “Look,.. he’s afraid to cough.”

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At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. “Isn’t it true,” he bellowed, “that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?”

The witness stared out the window as though he hadn’t hear the question.

“Isn’t it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?” the lawyer repeated.
The witness still did not respond.

Finally, the judge leaned over and said, “Sir, please answer the question.”
“Oh,” the startled witness said, “I thought he was talking to you.”

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A man goes to the eye doctor. The receptionist asks him why he is there.

The man complains, “I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes.”

The receptionist asks, “Have you ever seen a doctor?”

the man replies, “No, just spots.”

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Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don’t worry it will take just five minutes.

Patient: And how much will it cost?

Dentist: It’s $90.00.

Patient: $90.00 for just a few minutes work???

Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.

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